“There is always one person you love who becomes that definition. It usually happens retrospectively, but it happens eventually. This is the person who unknowingly sets the template for what you will always love about other people, even if some of these loveable qualities are self-destructive and unreasonable. But that person still wins. They win, and you lose. Because for the rest of your life, they will control how you feel about everyone else.
Chuck Klosterman, in Killing Yourself To Live : 85% Of A True Story.
this is what i feel right now. who cares ryte? huh.
i wish i can say fuck you. fuck you, for you deserve every ounce of damnation that phrase carries. but how can i? not when i am refusing to let go. not the memories, not the feelings. they're all worth it. even the heartbreak that came with it. you were the one thing in my life that felt true; even though reality has proven to be the direct opposite. screw my delusional self.i refuse.
and i am still very much a heartbroken wreck.
chaet! i fuck u. A****. hell is foe u.
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